We live our lives in a false understanding that we are our body and thoughts. We live with our hearts encased with layers of old impression from all our actions. We think we are separate beings. We suffer.
Then spiritual masters say we must surrender to God. We must trust in the Divine. As we approach that edge, that cliff we must jump off of, we freeze. We don’t feel we can leave behind our past, our concept of who we are and the safety of the approval and false understanding we live in. It’s too frightening. We walk to the edge of freedom, the edge of surrender, and turn back to our old habits; our drinking, gambling, craving for love, search for approval, desires for money, popularity and relationship. The old cage feels safe and familiar despite the fact that it is our prison.
How scary to jump off the edge and surrender. We think we will fall and die. We know we will lose everything that went before. But what dies is the ego. What we lose are the boundaries, the prison and the limitations. Mostly we lose the suffering.
What’s left is love. When we surrender to God the past is gone. The worry, the fixing ourselves, the shame and the search evaporate. We jump off the cliff and we fear we will fall, but we are held in love. God catches us and in that love we find everything we were looking for. The desires vanish because this love is all that we ever wanted. Our desires for relationship, approval, sufficiency, wealth, power, beauty and acceptance were all leading us to this love. Those desires were not wrong because they arose from our deeper desire for this one love. But those old desires could never fulfill us, satisfy us or make us feel complete. Only surrender brings the openness to receive God’s love and only that love ends desire, ends the search, ends the mind racing to find satisfaction.
Have courage to not turn back from the edge. Jump into surrender and feel the freedom, the peace -caught in the love, held by God, merging into God, feeling that God is fully love, fully us.